I don’t know what the hell I’m gonna talk about, but I figure I’ve got a few things weighing on my mind. There’s certainly enough intrigue to go forward with this entry.
Before I got side-tracked by interruption and whatnot, I was updating my writer’s blog. I had planned to do a little commentary while I re-read Chapter 4 of what is sure to be my life’s work.
The fact I’m getting the urge and feeling the need to update and get back with the program feels pretty good. Because its my project, not something else completely random that I’m writing about. Surely, writing about celebrity, movie and music alone isn’t going to be doing me any favors. Pretty much just shows me to be someone who doesn’t have a life.
I don’t need my writing to show that unfortunate fact, but editing that same story makes me feel like I have something worth working on, worth fighting for, etc, etc.
I can only say how many times how great this album is, this song, this movie… this interview, the list goes on. Yet, when the writer’s itch comes, I gotta do it.
With a few breaks in the action, I don’t think Robert Downey Jr. of all people wouldn’t mind if I kept talking about him. Though I can’t help but wonder… supposing he ever got a hold of all this, if he ever asked “what else does this gal have going on”
I’ve got a soft spot for a multitude of subjects and when it needs to be addressed, I’m going to write about it the best way I can. If I have to dispense a complicated emotion through my writing, so be it. It’s easier than just keeping it bottled up all day. Someone with less going on would explode under the pressure sooner or later.
Supposing I encounter something or someone very striking that made me feel things I never had before, I explain the complexity of it through my words…
My greatest of soft spots is the clichéd old story of good verus evil. You find it all of the old stories, especially when it comes to the science-fiction and fantasy. For George Lucas, there was Luke Skywalker and Darth Vadar. For J.K. Rowling, it was Harry Potter and Tom Marvolo Riddle.
Magical creatures that don’t exist in reality as well… of course as a female, unicorns and pegasues became some of my first characters (well, technically, they’re all pegasues but they have the unicorn horn too)…
Dragons are always really fascinating to me too, that’s why they appear in not one but two of my stories. The sea dragons that occur in the mermaid realm of Orion’s tale are the representation of good and evil themselves… white light and darkness. For a change, it’s nice to write about dragons that are good, and in fact, serve as allies. There is a book lingering in my old shoebox that I got from some bit of randomness, book sale or it was handed down from a cousin called “Dealing with Dragons” that I’d been meaning to read. Just to see what’s going on.
And before anyone asks, yes, I know of the existence of Eargon of Artemis Fowl fame… I saw the movie and as impressive as Saphira was as a good dragon, the storyline detracted from it so much that I was unable to recover. I never read the book so I had no idea what was going on. Suddenly, the dragon rider has a vision of someone calling for help and the real storyline starts to unfold. It was so jarring.
Found the book. I’ll definitely get a little into that later.
My protagonists are almost always male. I’m not sure why that it is, exactly, but I have a few ideas. When my character is of that sex, that makes it all the more easier to write for him. I become more excited to see what’s going to happen to him next, especially when… shoot, makes me sound so superficial… all of my guys are good looking, generally. And they’re all good at heart, even when they have a rough exterior that is most often seen by whoever they interact with.
Female characters, when they’re not the one serving as the love interest for my guy, terrify me sometimes. They reflect some things about me I wish other people didn’t see, that I could change. Everything either works out for them, they seem very selfish and I dunno, it’s like I’m living through those characters, having them fulfill my wishes. Their make-up always reflects them supporting the male character.
I am a sucker for magic, so a lot of my works have it in some form.
The first couple stories I wrote stemmed from mythology in some form. I wrote Jonas’s own mythology and with Orion, I borrowed a bit from the Greeks (actually, the prologue was directly influenced by a sequence in Disney’s “Fantasia”). I am definitely a sucker for Greek Mythology and I know its contents quite well, even more so now that I took a college course in it.
That was how it started.
Or actually, it started stemmed deeply in the realm of soap opera where everything was to the utmost extreme. I humbly confess that with one story, I must have rewritten it half a dozen times, but the fact of the matter remains that I made the last section of it the most exciting… I included all kinds of terrible things in there.
Bullying for one, domestic abuse as another, my own little pinch of thirsting for excellent grades, all to push this poor teenage boy to at least try to take his own life.
Since October 7, 2002, the idea of teenage suicide became a fascination of mine to no end. It’s really horrible that I put it like that because its nothing to sneeze at, nothing to joke about. At this moment, I’m thinking of another way to lead to that critical point. I see it as a movie… the entirity of it is in flashbacks, but what carries it through from scene to scene is a therapy session. I turned it into a group therapy session from just a storyline in chronological order, but it sounded too much like The Breakfast Club and definitely biased… I made the entire session about him. Apparently, giving my character a complex, believing his story is the most critical one in the room, the one worth telling.
I would much rather have Jamie be pitied than to be arrogant… in the long run of his psychological recovery (his friends got wind of his plan and got him to the E.R. before it was too late), he decided to give life another chance. Although stronger than before, his constitution is still a bit weak despite it being a whole year after the fact.
If I can succeed in making Julian wallowing in self-pity 2 years after he got clean, I can certainly continue with Jamie undergoing the same thing. Time heals wounds, but the psychological take the longest
I admit, it was pretty bold to write about such a touchy subject in my first original story. I certainly don’t want to glorify the intent of suicide… the entire story started from one question “what could drive a person to take their own life”
Now, of course, with the increase in gay suicides as a result of bullying, there are even more reasons to that fact.
After seeing David Yost’s interview about the homophobia he encountered, I started considering another story for my character, Casey Cartlon, who seems to be a wonder at talking down her peers, getting them through the toughest of times.
Supposing she had befriended and known a gay teen for a long time… just recently, he comes out of the closet. I’ve yet to determine how/when/why… I’m not sure if she’s the one he initally comes out, or his parents or he gets outed by some of the school bullies. Once I figure out the mechanics of it, I can move forward. Whatever the case may be, she’s going to be his rock, his support system.
Julian was the best vehicle I could use to explore the issue of drug addiction, but I’m terrified at the mere idea of writing about a character currently in the midst of it… writing about their ups and downs, how their friends turned their backs on them… I’m hitting too close to the subject of inspiration, first of all, and second of all, I’d hate, again, for my character not to come across the way I want them to.
That was the first time in my life I came across a person in any medium (reality or fantasy) who had a problem they couldn’t overcome and despite everything, I had their back and hoped to the last second that they’d succeed in beating what disabled them in the first place.
Although, now that I think about, I did write a little bit about addiction… a friend of Jamie’s from his old neighborhood comes into the picture, falls into the wrong group of friends, he gets in deep with them until he dies from tuberclousis… yeah, I think I was into Moulin Rouge around that time.
I’d written a couple stories with a character very loosely based on myself fulfilling things that I wish I could, but didn’t have the courage… telling the guys in her life how she really feels about them, to the point of wanting to take action…
The original purpose of stories was for them to be told… that’s how the Odyssesy was disturbed in the old days, it was told aloud and passed on from person to person.
I don’t remember much about Farenheit 451, but that’s how it ended. The “fireman” who challenged society and broke away from it came into Elsewhere (the other realm noted in “The Giver”) where stories are kept alive through the spoken word instead of keeping books.
As a fundamental personal rule, one of the things I fear most is the extinction of books (ah, it terrifies me so much that I could barely spell the word “extinction”)… Farenheit 451 gave me the principle of being opposed to even the suggestion of burning books… sure, John Bender can tear up the books in the Shermer High School library all he wants, but he’s not destroying precious literature by burning it
Good and evil is my go-to genre of story, but right up there with it is the blossoming of romance between characters. The one I didn’t really have to work on too hard was Orion and Penelope. They’d kinda been going out for years and friends for life. In every other story, it always started with the whole “boy meets girl” cliché (sometimes “girl meets boy”)… and there’s always a spark between them.
Clearly, I experience self-doubt every now and then. The blog clearly dictates that all the time… so naturally the conflicts that are among the hardest to overcome for my characters are internal… overcoming the obstacles self-doubt brings with it.
The only thing that might be a universal turn-off by anyone who reads my works after they’re published, if they are at all… there’s the same kind of formula to my stories and furthermore, all of my leading men possess the same characteristics. They have distinctly colored eyes or they’re mysterious, relatively unknown to their peers.
With the exception of Chihiro and Lucas, all of my pairings like each other immediately or establish a chemistry right away.
Chihiro is set apart because she’s a more active female protagonist, she has a lot of inner strength and she understands the value of sacrifice, gives her life for Lucas… the one she believes can make more of a difference in the world than she can hope to. (There’s the self-doubt again, but she gives her best effort to make sure he stays alive in any given situation… extremely selfless for being so)
Some of my other recent short stories came about as a result of one bit of inspiration. Most often, a movie.
The short story that occurs between Cameron and Sam was inspired directly by two sources, “Remember Me” (the residual feelings of loss left behind) and a dream I had featuring Robert Pattinson… the initial scene I wrote, which ended up coming towards the end of the story, was about meeting him in a mall at random, randomly talking, then the girl breaks down, inconsolable and he finds out everything that’s going on.
It’s hard to shuttle all of those crucial details to the end, but I managed.
Most likely will be the only expression of patriotism to ever make it into my works
Then there was Casey Carlton, the Nick Carraway to Alex “Jolienne” Carine… as an observer, I wrote about her through my narrator’s eyes… then suddenly, the two of them met, hit it off right away. Then they meet again under more dramatic circumstances, Alex is battling leukemia and Casey happens to be a hospital volunteer.
Sometimes I wonder about rewriting that story, but Casey goes in for the surgery I had… and Alex ends up being her roommate… they bond through those routes… the only kink is that orthepedic and oncology patients don’t stay in the same wing of the hospital. Unless I write that Alex is there for tests, not sure what’s going on at the current time… then a couple of days later, Alex is gone and Casey has to find out what happened to her
I’m not sure what the policy of age is when it comes to bone marrow transplants, but it seems less likely, unless I bring in the cancer storyline into full swing a few months later, for Casey to be the key donor that saved her life.
I’m going to assume for the moment that anyone under the age of 18 needs parental permission to do such a thing… as is the case with donating blood, when they had the blood drives at my school, those under 18 needed a parental permission form signed beforehand.
Cancer/Leukemia is something that’s kinda fascinated me too so when Alexis Grace came along, an American Idol contestant I could not get off my mind, she was the perfect canvas to write a story around. At least with her overall look.
Then of course Prince inspired some of my writing too… but two of the stories remain unfinished to this day. One was inspired by Under the Cherry Moon, but with role reversal… I felt it was unfair that the girl was rich and the guy wasn’t, but then I figured out halfway through “well, duh, that’s what Cinderella is all about”
the other was otherwise inspired by the Planet Earth album track “Mr. Good-night”… but I didn’t hang in there long enough to bring the fantasy of it to scene.
Actually, maybe that three stories… I started one that was meant to be an album fic… a sequel, if you will, to what I did with “Come”… the same character I played, but with him a few years after the story left off…
Music is a pretty big thing for me, so naturally with Prince at the helm as the key element, the possibilities were endless.
That more or less concludes that discussion.
I’m not sure whether I’m set to start reading “Dealing with Dragons” or to let some other things subside.
They showed Thanksgiving scenes on Reelz today and there were plenty other movies that I didn’t take into account…
Spider-man for one
Planes, Trains and Automobiles… can’t believe I didn’t remember that was to get home on Thanksgiving
a few films with Christina Ricci hating the holiday (Addams Family Values & The Ice Storm)
You Got Mail (totally forgot that too)
Miracle on 34th Street… well, duh… it starts with the parade, doncha ya know
so of course, “Home for the Holidays” jumps to mind immediately… I mentioned a year back that they really didn’t do any movies about Thanksgiving, which is why there’s the great leap from Halloween to Christmas… my mom mentions this movie, saying that it is really weird…
she thought “Less than Zero” was weird too, but this is for a different reason
the scene they showed was when the turkey ends up in that poor woman’s lap, lol…
I spent half the time swooning and the other half recalling Robert recalling the awkward conversation… lecture Jodie Foster gave him… the movie shows on Oprah’s TV station this Saturday morning, so I figure, what the hell, I’ll watch it again… ’tis the season…
“I know what’s going on. I’m worried about you on this one because its a great part and we’re almost done. I am worried about what will happen to you if you think you can do this again”
there were some genuine heart-felt moments, yes… but he was most definitely high on set…
so I found it almost surreal that I was watching that one scene… I know part of the glint in his eyes was due to black tar, but there’s a certain something about him I couldn’t put my finger on. That x-factor, je ne said qua, that tells me that he’s a great actor that really knows his craft well… just am in awe of him
last night I took the gamble with the Jonathan Ross appearance and to my complete relief, it was worth the gamble… my jaw dropped, my head was inclining unconsciously to one side or the other as I tried to make sense of it all… I used to think that Prince could command a stage like nobody’s business, just got my attention and I didn’t want to look away
I guess Robert had me swooning, that’s the only way I can describe it… and man was I happy to be swooning again…
clearly he hadn’t lost his touch 😉 and I haven’t overindulged in general concerning him…
I actually spent a little bit of that time trying to figure out what kinds of songs I’d write if I were to dabble fully into the songwriting gig… he said it was something that stretched him and doing something like that is good for a person every now and then…
I’m hoping to avoid wallowing in my own self-pity and really putting in the lyrics and emotions that matter… where someone could be moved or at least see that there’s more to me than I’m comfortable with letting on
one more thing:
saw the extra footage, including the last scene, of “Thor”… and just gotta say “TEASE!!!!”
oh well, some 6 more months until “The Avengers” hits theaters