A Ray of Sunshine on a Cloud Day

That’s got to be the cheesiest thing I could think of, but it’s actually true… It’s cloudy outside, probably raining, and plain & simple, Robert Downey Jr. on Ellen… omg, between this and Jay Leno last night, it felt like Christmas should.
Like I really haven’t felt that really uplifted feeling in a very long time. And yeah, it’s probably all I’m gonna get this year as a mega Downey fan. But might as well live it up when I’m lucky enough to see him whenever he’s, you know… promoting movies and stuff like that.

Technically, it’s been mostly cloudy and kinda miserable since May started. I’ve had a few morning where the weather had me thinking “ugh, I don’t wanna get up today.” All kinds of stuff… and considering the night I had, this is exactly what I needed.

It took me a while for things to kick in with Jay Leno… it’s always fun when Robert tells tales about his youth, like before he got into acting. Some of the best stories involve his father

I think he told this one story about how he had a lot of meager non-acting gigs and one of them was as a shoe salesman that lasted 3 months cuz he had sticky fingers… walked away with a pair of size 12’s even though that’s not his size… stranger things have happened, trust me…

The only thing kinda spoiling the affair today on Ellen… I know it’s supposed to be a joke, but it brings up a key issue… eh… it’s kinda up there for me, but not nearly as up there as getting this man an Oscar…

I mean, it worked for Heath Ledger… after he died, all these petitions were circulating to get him nominated for an Oscar even though The Dark Knight hadn’t even come out yet… he might not have been on the ballot, if not for the petitions…

we should SO petition to get Robert Downey Jr. a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame

so I… I mean, he doesn’t need to go thru that again… it must be so embarassing to sit next a woman probably young enough to be your daughter who gets a star before you did

But to be fair 😕 Scarlet Johannson is the only Avenger that has a star… everyone else is kind of a newcomer… although I’ll bet that badass Samuel L. Jackson has a star… and if he doesn’t, he’ll blow your goddam head off cuz he’s a badass MF

:falloff:

Yeah… between this morning and last night (all the drama aside), I guess it’s one of those “thank God I’m alive to see this” kind of things…
He can totally make my day or night, depending what I’m up to and what kind of mood I’m in…

I don’t know what the hell my problem is this week… like I’d been an emotional basketcase… I mean, technically [this is my small, sarcastic kind of voice] he started it… for whatever reason, I DUNNO, I had another one of those somber nights Sunday night getting around to watching my boxset the first time since I got it…

I’m gonna keep things as they are, not gonna rock the boat… at least until I see the movie… after I see the movie, anything goes. Either tomorrow or Sunday, but definitely this weekend. And so far, my friend Dave loved it… a bunch of people on Twitter loved it, including Chris Daughtry… Ebert apparently loved it, although the majority of his review was a cast list and he just said it was everything you’d expect as a movie like a sports all-star game

BEST ANALOGY EVER

I didn’t even think of it like that and I’m a sports fan… eh, sort of…

I’ve had a couple of somber nights in reference to this guy… this all kinda started with one… Julian had me a complete mess… a little of this and that… sometimes it was about him, murmering about the past… sometimes it was about me and why I’m not a better person…

but I think I’d prefer any given night… when something relating to him or as a result of him and it’s my own melodrama in my own head… ANY… compared to last night…

“American Idol” was a whirlwind of emotions and tears… and I think I just about gave up… I don’t have the energy to go on a tirade about why Phillip Phillips should not win American Idol…
I don’t know… I don’t know…

so far this week… well, I don’t even know what the hell my problem was after “Ally McBeal”… I can’t remember…
Chris Mann doing “Ave Maria” SO well… ah [puts hand over heart] on “The Voice”
I nearly lost it when every other guy on “The Voice” got voted through and my girl Juliet was the only one who made it…

I swear I would have taken both members from team Cee-Lo in the finals over what we’re left with…
Tony Lucca is a popularity candidate, nowhere NEAR the best… and Adam Levine, who I have respected up to this point despite some STRANGE song choices on his part… I’m actually kinda furious with him right now because Katrina Parker coulda have been the finalist if he wasn’t sticking up for the bro-code or talking about bromances…

strangely, along with all the extra emotions and stuff, I’d been picturing myself just breaking a lot of noses… like I’d take the heel of my palm and just WHAM… maybe not Adam Levine, but he totally screwed things over by giving Tony a margin of 20 points over Katrina with his 100 points… I’ll tell him what he can do with those 100 points… but I won’t… cuz… hell with it, I’m no lady… :spit:

so I might be voting for the first time on The Voice Monday night for my girl Juliet… cuz she’s gotta win…
and if not, it has to be down to her and Chris Mann at the end of it…
Jermaine Paul has a decent voice, but no game
Tony Lucca doesn’t even have that good a voice…

I’m so impatient with men on these shows. I don’t know why… maybe because it’s because there’s so many of them and my collection really has every kind there is…
that’s why I kinda called Colton Dixon my “only exception”… its in quotes cuz it shares a name with a Paramore song I never really got, but heck, I could imagine singing that about him…

I mean, he made me really invest in him and care about him even when it seemed like a girl was going to win this year… well, I was aiming that way at least…

Hollie Cavanugh made me cry but it was like with Chris Mann, it was a good kind of cry… I’ve heard “Bleeding Love” so many times, but when she did it… I believed her, believed IN her… and heck, that alone might have taken votes away from Skylar and that’s why she went home…

I swear, I was ready to blow a f’ing fit… I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs… but I couldn’t get myself to scream cuz that’s not my thing…
I cry ’till I can’t cry no more

and apparently there was NO shortage of waterworks last night… I don’t even know what the biggest reason… because I was… well, not devestated… extremely upset about Skylar leaving… or because I was so PISSED… 

when Phillip doesn’t put me to sleep, he pisses me off so much… it’s not even the Sanjaya annoying factor… he pisses me off…

what’s even worse, America is pissing me off by voting for him…
WHO IN THE HELL IS VOTING FOR THIS GUY?

Jimmy Iovine probably said the most honest to God truth I ever heard from this season… He said that Phillip has been COASTING and last night he wasn’t even trying, he picked 2 bland songs and he pretty much mimed a finger cutting his throat…

that’s giving it to him straight… he also said that Jessica screwed things up by doing Tina Turner…

yet neither were in the bottom… it was BOTH of the girls I spent the note voting for… not all night… the only time I voted non-stop thru the 2 hours was for Kris Allen the night he won American Idol…

now that’s sticking it to the man… Lyndsay Parker had a point… the judges pimping up Adam Lambert could have costed him the crown

that’s not the only thing and for once, I just had to thank God that America is conversative to that degree cuz… this isn’t about Adam’s homosexuality… it’s not a homophobic thing…

it’s kinda like with Phillip, I wonder if the people who are voting for him aren’t deaf-tone or just plain deaf because they can’t hear the difference between a singer or a guy with no singing talent whatsoever… someone even said he had charisma…

NO FING WAY…

you want charisma… RDJ is chock full of it… that’s why I’m crazy about him

Phillip just has good looks, not great looks… and he can play guitar… that’s it… there’s nothing remarkable about him other than this streak of not being in the bottom three ever…

I swear, I try to do everything I can to keep my favorites in and it’s never enough… now Skylar’s gone too…

this morning whenever I heard that she was going to be on Live with Kelly on Monday, it felt like there was a knife going through my chest… now I’m gonna start cryin’ again…

I’m furious… that America is purposely voting off every single INTERESTING person on the show, everyone that I get excited to go see whenever Wednesday night comes around…

now I’ve just got Hollie and voting thru the night for her might not even be enough…

after she’s gone, I’ve got Jessica… my only hope for having a girl win this year…

and if it comes down between her and Phillip going into either the top 2 or the actual win… I want there to be riots in the streets… keeping the death toll minimal if at all possible… but I want there to be riots because… dammit… I’m never gonna be able to stop cryin’

The only thing I can think to say is what my dad said… probably the coolest thing he’d said in a long time that made me wanna just… give a booyah, I guess, I dunno… I’m too exhausted for anything else…

Phillip should be a man and WALK OFF…

I mean, he’s gotta know that everyone left is better than him, has more vocal talent… he doesn’t deserve to win by any means…

more to the point, he’s going to be such an epic fail as a recording artist that his album won’t sell a single copy anywhere outside of his own town/state…

I could think of a million things I’d rather do than watch him perform one more time…

it’s gotten so bad that, last week especially…

hear me out… I would rather watch paint dry… I’ll double-it… I’d rather PAY 100 bucks to watch paint dry than have to endure another of his performances for nothing… I’d pay to get rid of him…

NO… not literally…

heh, I’d love to break his nose, then he wouldn’t be able to sing at all… :facepalm:
then he’d probably get the sympathy vote cuz some random stalker attacked him…

literally, he would just have to stand there and he’d win just by having a f’ing pulse

I’m so resisting the temptation to just lay a whole bunch of expletives on him… I really am that pissed off…

so with my own emotionality 🙄

I don’t know what my f’ing problem is this week…

It could be the fact that I haven’t been super emotional about anything recently, maybe keeping a lot of hurt inside about randomness (I don’t even know if that’s true)… and I can’t keep things in anymore…

or plain & simple, PMS is screwing me over royally… and… to put it bluntly, the other shoe hasn’t dropped yet 🙄 but I must be getting there cuz it’s been getting worse…

I swear, I was cryin’ so much last night that I couldn’t even breathe through my nose and I have almost no saliva to swallow…

yeah, emotional basketcase just about covers it…

the only repreieve I got while writing a rather angry blog entry on a small notepad… I made probably the most awesome burn, low-blow joke I ever made about anyone…

I mean, Phillip’s getting by on next to nothing… this week he wasn’t even trying…
I think, who in America would pick him as their idol because there’s nothing spectular about him… who would idolize him…

then I thought of a sick-twisted joke… my folks are really not sold on the whole Occupy Wall-Street movement… they think that the young people my age should be pounding the pavement for employment instead of picketing…

OCCUPY WALL-STREET should make Phillip Phillips their mascot…

taking it from my folks’ POV, mind you… they think that these people are too lazy to do anything other than picket and complain… Phillip’s living the new American dream… getting by on zero talent…

now, I’m not entirely heartless when it comes to this guy… I mean, there were two performances Phillip Phillips did that I loved…

Still Rainin’ by John Lange and
Hard to Handle by The Black Crowes

that’s the kind of stuff he should do and stick to… everything else is like… taking a song and making it BORING AS HELL… with his unique style or whatever… he’s not even remotely interesting anymore… he was for the first… I dunno… week of the show… except for that… he’s only pissed me off by getting thru over the people I really care about…

and something else I can’t remember cuz…

oh yeah… and ruining Phil Collins songs whenever he picks one to do…
Phillip and Phil Collins DON’T MIX…

just don’t…

maybe I’m putting salt in the wound, but I’m gonna check more comments… are people still thinking that Joshua is coasting or is the tide finally turning to the real enemy…

well… not too many people were fond of Skylar… but she was one of the most exciting things I’d seen on the show in a while… she’s a country singer I can get behind and I haven’t thought there’d be another girl I’d feel that way about since Taylor Swift…

now there’s cracks about… Phillip’s doing with illness, cut him slack…

in the words of Chuggaaconroy, the epic NOOooo…

illness or not, Phillip still has zero game… haha, some people even said he’s not that original… the Dave Matthews thing… he got compared to Joe Cocker…

I don’t even like Joe Cocker…
f’ing hate his voice… I mean… Phillip was better off doing that horrendous cover of that Beatles song, which is the theme song for the “Wonder Years”… Joe Cocker’s voice is just… I hate it, I can’t stomach it… rubs me in all the wrong places…

🙄

maybe I should tweet Nigel Lythgoe… asking “do you promise that there isn’t a fix in place for Phillip to win cuz he’s nowhere near as talented as the last three people who went home”

It’s a downright insult for this to be a singing competition and the best singer isn’t even up to win…
well, it’s not entirely singing…

You have to be a great singer, you have to have great stage presence, and you…

what else can I say that Phillip can’t do…

he isn’t a great singer and his stage presence is like… what stage presence… he has zero game, like I said

but I’m in no way going to be that person who sends a bunch of death threats, like drop dead and all that… I’m NOT mean… but I want to seriously give this guy a talking to and maybe I can talk him out of competing because he and I both know he’s not the best in the competition

heck, just maybe… he could have even THROWN what little he had this week by just doing the minimal and that still wasn’t enough

I mean, possibly, I could have voted thru the night for Colton and that could have saved him from the worst showing he ever had… and I wouldn’t be in this position now

but I didn’t… I knew it wasn’t going to be enough… something in me told me so

I always found out kinda fast years ago that I can’t juggle phone lines cuz that would ruin one of the parties I’m voting for… now my voting can be focused primarily on Hollie…

preferrably… Hollie goes home next week regardless of anything I do…
then I can vote for Jessica with everyone else who remotely CARES that the singer with the most vocal talent wins…

little by little, she’s won me over as a fan… I wouldn’t buy her album necessarily unless it had an incredible kick-ass first single… but I’d take her over Joshua and I’d take Joshua over Phillip any day for the rest of my life…

do I think Joshua is the best singer on the Idol stage ever…

I f’ing hate the judges when they say he’s like the best ever… geesh, it’s not like he’s the second coming or anything…

I doubt he’s one of the best contestants EVER… well, maybe over 11 seasons, he’d be in maybe my top 20 😕

best ever… HELL NO…

and it’s not just voice… but it’s down to who I enjoy more, who’s given me an interesting, fun night to look forward to… that was a formula I put a lot of faith in after the past couple years…

Kris Allen, Lee DeWyze and Scotty McCreery all won because I believed in them that much and America agreed that they were too cool to eliminate…

although I’d been second guessing Lee DeWyze since he won… “Sweet Serendpity” was almost as bad as that song “No Boundaries” that was so bad that it didn’t make it onto Kris or Adam’s debut albums

Kris Allen was awesome cuz he transformed his song choices every week and it was something different… it was a whole new arrangement, different flavors in each one… he was the entire package…

Scotty McCreery was cool cuz he turned every song into a great country vocal… countryfied whatever he did… maybe not as good as Kris as doing that whole transformation thing, but I loved watching him every week…

It’s a little ironic that… a couple things…

I was devestated about Colton and my mourning period was on & off for about a week… and finished right after that…

I thought I’d given up fighting, but then THIS started happened…

with Skylar, I just couldn’t take anymore… it was like a double-edged sword (one edge still feels like its sticking out of my chest)…

to be fair, she kinda let me down with the first performance… yet Jimmy Iovine thought her 2nd performance sucked…

it was literally the point, well after Hollie… and maybe a little bit of Joshua… this week was lethargic… I just didn’t care anymore… I was tired of it…

then Hollie sang “Bleeding Love” and made a believer out of me… that she could have gotten thru without the bottom this week…

America sucks… and I think they screwed her over intentionally by putting her in the first spot…

put Phillip in the first spot and we’ll put the “death spot” to the test… he’d never gone first this entire competition and he needs to know what that’s like…

okay I posted a comment on Yahoo and I’ll see where that gets me:

“Phillip Phillips should be a man and WALK OFF. He oughta know he’s not the most talented person there, all the interesting people that I actually care about seeing the show for are leaving b4 him. I’d rather pay $100 to watch paint dry than take him for another week. Worst case scenario, I hope Colton pulls a Daughtry and whoops him in record sales 100x over where everyone forgets about the guy duller than dirt that got named twice”

It really sucks… this has been probably my favorite season ever… I’m crazy about everyone except for this guy… and he’s probably gonna win…

I don’t know what else I can do. My voting never seems to make a difference.

I’m SO hoping for an outcry if Jessica goes home before him because that’s the worst case scenario… by every means conceivable…

even better… I want to search out the people who’d been spamming votes for this guy because they must either be from his hometown, his home state or TONE-DEAF… where they wouldn’t know a voice that sings in key if it… haha… broke their nose

not that breaking noses has to do with knowing a good voice or not… but you get what I mean…

I’d totally rather be crying myself to sleep over something Downey related than Phillip Phillips getting thru another week…

sometimes I feel like it insults my intelligence as a music junkie that he’s still here… making me miserable…

on the plus side of things in general… I’d made good lee-way with The Word… just finished going into the Purple Rain discussion on the actual song

that’s been keeping my attention away from getting super syked for The Avengers and any press that he’s doing for the movie…

I kinda feel like… I dunno… we’re old pals… I recognize how he makes me feel and he makes me happy… happier than a lot of other things I have going for me right now… which is minimal, at best
😕

He makes me smile because how he is… I know he’s capable of it and I’m so grateful that the love hasn’t completely gone out of things… I’m still crazy about him, but I’ve managed to manage that…

It’s at least a good kind of crazy and… I dunno… pretty much the whole thing about he’s being himself and that’s good enough for me… so what if I get a little crazy when I want other people to give him props with awards and stars and all that…

gotta be passionate about something

it’s also so cute when he’s talking about Exton now he’s like so overjoyed and wow…
can’t believe that Jay Leno had the nerve to show baby pictures despite the fact Susan said for him not to…

impulse control problem, remember?

looks just like him
and apparently at 3 months, they’re already having conversations or at least he was impressionating the kind of conversations they have when he was on Ellen…

I think that’s the only thing that’s possibly cuter than seeing him when he’s totally in love with Susan… now he’s totally in love with his kid…

I don’t know what’s hotter… seeing a man melt when he’s talking about someone he cares about or seeing a man who knows exactly who he is and OWNS it… the way he does…

on top of that, he’s still looking fine as ever… omg…

It feels so good to gush about him again. Takes me away from a lot of other negativity brewing in my life.

And you can bet 😉 that there’ll be a review of The Avengers as soon as I go to see it… it’s going to be EPIC

at least I hope so :fingers crossed:
I’m definitely taking comfort in the fact that there’s only one showing at our local theater so I don’t need to revisit history where I walk in on the end of the movie and it ruins my entire day 🙄

the whole star on the Walk of Fame aside… Robert trumps Scarlett Johannson in two ways:

1) he has kids, she has none (lol, I know, a low blow, but whatever)
2) he can SING…

like they were doing a little game of guess the celebrity and he was doing all these impressions that Ellen totally got right (except for Gwyneth cuz he was channeling her character Pepper Potts and nobody got the reference, lol)… all these singing talents were up when Scarlett was giving clues and she just wasn’t even trying…

AH-HA…

3) he was nominated for two Oscars and won 2 Golden Globes…
she’s only been nominated for 4 Golden Globes and never won either

I woulda been so sore otherwise

ugh, I’m so jealous… she’s got two years on me, but she’s exactly where I wish I was

three guesses where, lol

Honest to God, I think I’d have a complete meltdown if I didn’t have use of my hands or else I wouldn’t be able to vent about stuff like this… in my writing… that helped take care of some of last night’s melodrama

interestingly I’ve had two dreams the past couple days that seem like something out of… well, my story about my character Jonas that I’d left alone for a while… kinda gave up on bringing that thru the next stage of rewrites…

one of them I was in the woods at the back of my aunt’s which inspired the woods that separate his house from Nina’s… taking pictures

then I saw a flash of something that looked like “Spirited Away” scene… except when Haku and Chihiro meet, she runs into his arms and he whispers to tell her where to go… rather than the whole… “you shouldn’t be here, leave before it gets dark”…

but there’s this embrace that I remember… I think I felt the actual embrace but there was something so gentle about it… and comforting… I believe I dreamed that part during the latest part in the morning when I’d been woken up by lawnmowers and went back to sleep half an hour later…

It’s glaringly obvious 🙄 that maybe I should give it another shot… or at least try to…
because my home is really with fiction and I just haven’t had the energy and perservence to get thru it

can’t believe the whole morning gave way to my venting and doing this entry… but it started out like it was Christmas… like it feels rare to see RDJ on the road promoting films and such

he’d been holding back this time in particular… I think because he wants to be there for Susan and Exton… it’s so sweet how devoted he is 😎 he really is a great guy

despite my minimal efforts on the show’s website, I might not get my wish to actually meet him at any given point… but the fact that he, you know, takes me away from negativity, makes me smile… like I don’t even have to try to be happy when I’m around his energy… I just am…

and actually, come to think of it, that’s what really helped this time… I didn’t try hard at all to feel much of anything. It was just business as usual… a most joyous one at that.

Advertisements
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s